People Change …
I am not quite sure that this statement is true … or it might be true for certain behaviors but not the person … so do people really change??
Today was my birthday and I realized that people do not change as much as we would like to believe; they will still do that same things they always did and to a large extent, they become predictable to those around them, but again; isn’t that what we call characteristics of a personality??
I have come to find that jealous people will always envy you for what you have even if it was a piece of crap … selfish people will never learn how to give to others … angry people will never calm down and they will always find a way to make your life miserable because that is what they do … We will always lose friends to marriage … we will always have fights with our families … we will always feel stupid after we say something we don’t want to say … and it feels really silly that I am not able to talk about what is really bothering me …Do people change?
I vote … NO
March 29th, 2008 at 4:24 pm
Happy birthday!
I think that people learn to modify their behaviour, but essentially are the same and feel the same — it’s easier to modify that behaviour when you learn to mix other impulses in — ones that give you a very good reason (in your own mind) to change. It doesn’t stop you feeling the way you always did, but sometimes you have gained perspective over that, and won’t react the way you used to.
Looking back, I can see things I did or said when much younger that tie in with the things I do and say now, though.
Often I think I’ve changed a lot, but when I really think about it, I haven’t changed that much — just lived in different times and understood various issues differently.
March 29th, 2008 at 9:34 pm
At first, happy birthday.
Well I think people do change, but how much depends on them! Maybe they won’t completely change, but at least they might change what we don’t like in them. Some people, they simply refuse to.
March 30th, 2008 at 12:20 am
HAPPPPPYY Birthday
You can count on the following
1) Annoying things about people never change
2) Good things about people change to annoying
3) We change, therefore our perspective on people change as well
March 30th, 2008 at 2:02 am
I hope it was a BLESSED birthday!! In spite of what looks like maybe a few annoying occurrences.
Perhaps these people are not using life’s conflicts effectively for change, as I have found time + conflict = change. But most people fear letting go of the worst aspects of their character, they fear the unknown of what they would be left with, they don’t trust good.
March 30th, 2008 at 2:03 am
happy birthday
this is my first comment here altho i have to admit im a silent admirer of ur blog
i believe ppl only change from the inside. no amount of crtisizm or advice will do anything.. and in order to change, by own initiative, one has to do a lot of soul searching and pin point exactly what is it thats making one’s life miserable, or what cud make one’s life easier with less negative vibes.
March 30th, 2008 at 2:32 am
Belated happy birthday Khalidah. I hope you enjoyed it at least!
March 30th, 2008 at 2:50 am
Happy Birthday…
About changing… here is a quote…
“Can one change oneself? I doubt it. Or if there is any change it must be measured as the millionth part of millimeter, when the poor ghosts have gone what remains are ordinary obligation and ordinary interests, one can live quietly and try to do tiny good things and have no one”
Iris Murdoch, The Sea The Sea
People evolve but not change….
April 4th, 2008 at 1:14 am
I agree, people don’t change.
If anything when you know someone as a kid, you know what they will really be like underneath it all when they grow up, they just learn to hide it.
July 10th, 2008 at 12:58 pm
bikh
July 11th, 2008 at 2:42 am
I believe people change enormously during the course of their lifetime. Yes, you can predict certain future behaviours based on some traits of character, but essentially people change. Unfortunately, they do not always change into what you expect them to change, they form little annoying habits and become less and less flexible, I believe it is very difficult to avoid that. Futhermore, experiencing things makes us look at the same event in different ways at different stages in our lives, it makes us think differently and therefore act differently. Yes, a woman will not manage to teach her husband not to throw his socks all over the place if he was not taught that before getting married, but he will change on different levels. That is actually one of the main reasons why divorces occur. Because people gradually change and all of a sudden two people who thought were a perfect match, wake up that they no longer belong together. Their environment changed them, people they came in contact with, even each other’s influence changed them to a certain degree. This is something involuntary and independent of one’s efforts.
August 9th, 2008 at 7:37 am
long time khokha!
August 14th, 2008 at 2:04 am
The Jordanian blogsphere misses you. I hope you are having good times and enjoying your life, work and family.
May 21st, 2009 at 9:41 am
u hve mistaken the two different terms jealousy and envy together while assuming their meaning. jealous people have jealousy and envious envy which later term is treated always in positive spirit.generalising the people within certain behvioural traits cld be good observation; bt does it exclude your person from such generalisation?thx