Expectations …
In this time and age, we still strive for miracles to take us by surprise and somehow change our lives for the better, we still have high hopes to witness a great shift in our environment and surrounding; one that is unlikely and maybe even impossible, yet hope is a human nature that one cannot stop willingly … even those who are pessimistic or depressed, it is a myth that lost all hope because they still hope for something to give … an ending … a closure … anything!!!
I am sitting here and thinking about how this human characteristic is actually controlling us … at least subconsciously, otherwise; why do we keep doing the things that we do???
They say that if you want to change something, begin with yourself, but here is the thing, what if you did? what if you changed and tried to affect others and induce this change but it wasn’t enough? and it never is??? What now? Keep on going with the change or just go back to the old way that seems the norm where everyone else is concerned? What now?
For example; I really hate it when drivers cut in front of you at a traffic light, blocking the left lane altogether just to make it to the beginning of the line, and then maneuver to cut in front of you so that they don’t hit the island in the middle and you have to get out of the way … he is more important than you, his time is more valuable, he is more skillful than you and you have to live with that … it does not really matter if you are following every rule and law and going by the book, because those who don’t get to do that to you and piss you off and just drive away .. and if you don’t like it … that is your problem!!
You might argue that this has been the case for ever and that I should be used to it by now, but you see, I keep asking myself, why should I accept this? what changed that I cannot even tolerate these things any more? is this a part of growing older? or am I just becoming intolerant? maybe it is me!! or maybe I need a major change in my life to make it worth while because right now, I don’t really see the point of it!!
WHO CARES????
July 20th, 2009 at 1:00 am
I CARE! For your own personal dignity, it is worth it! Don’t let others drag you into their lack of excellence.
One thing that helps me remember, is that God sees all. Vengeance is His, He will repay. He sees our loyal obedience, and their recklessness. We will be rewarded, and hopefully they will repent and change so they can enjoy His mercy and not His wrath.
Wow. I don’t mean to make God the Big Traffic Cop in the Heavens, BUT, those who are unfaithful in the little things are usually unfaithful in the big things.
HEY, are we on for Friday??
July 20th, 2009 at 1:03 am
[...] Back to Blogging! By kinziblogs Go visit and welcome her back with a [...]
July 20th, 2009 at 1:14 am
Thanks Kinzi for your nice words and for your post about me back to blogging …
I will confirm about Friday in the next couple of days
July 20th, 2009 at 3:40 am
Hi Khalidah… I got here from Kinzi’s blog. Hope you don’t mind me commenting
what changed that I cannot even tolerate these things any more? is this a part of growing older? or am I just becoming intolerant? maybe it is me!! or maybe I need a major change in my life to make it worth while because right now, I don’t really see the point of it!!
It sounds to me like you are harboring a lot of resentments. That can make people feel pretty miserable, especially because it can start snowballing out of control. In the example you gave, for instance, that guy who cut you off was probably oblivious about how upset he made you, and he went on his way without a care in the world. But maybe you weer upset for quite a while, and something somebody else did later triggered the same reaction in you, even if it was something minor. So net effect is that the “perp” is completely unaffected by what he did, but you aren’t. You’re carrying that resentment around with you. I’m only saying this because its a problem I’ve had to deal with all my life, so I know something about it! Believe me, you will be much happier if you can find a way to just let go of things like that, when they happen. Here is a little ‘advice” thing I just found on google:
http://www.ehow.com/how_2111177_rid-resentments.html
I’m not sure how good it is but since it used an example almost exactly like yours, I decided to throw it in here
July 20th, 2009 at 3:57 am
I think change is such a dramastic word, I always thought people never change.
We work on ourselves and develop to the better, and that takes time and efforts but the true value doesnt happen over night and others see it before we do.
Just set your mission in life and plan how you gonna live your life and then set it on cruise at the speed you feel comfortable with and da heck with everybody else.
Once you are on this course you wont see but those who are talking the same language, evrybody else won’t matter anymore, those who are cut you off in the road wont matter to you anymore.
.. So whats going on Fridays?
Peace
July 20th, 2009 at 6:35 am
Can’t wait!
July 20th, 2009 at 7:45 am
Salam, I am new to your blog but I have been in that situation so many times. I do understand the group of people who say let it go, but I also think it is important to let these people know that WE see them, we know they have done wrong. Give them the horn and let them know you caught them. I don’t think we should stand or sit idly by and let these rule breakers get away with things everyday. They are causing accidents all the time. I know God sees all and they will get theirs in the end, but I like to remind them that we are here and know what they are up to.
July 21st, 2009 at 12:05 am
Craig ..
Thank you for passing by and for the article … it is true that I seem to have a lot of resentments bottled up inside me and I don’t think that it is these small things that are causing them … I went through a very tough time lately and still have to push my way through a lot yet to come .. maybe I am expressing this resentment towards minor issues because I am not ready yet to talk about the bigger ones … I am waiting for something to happen and the waiting on its own is not fun …
I will try to be more tolerant
July 21st, 2009 at 12:06 am
Khaled … maybe that is the whole deal … maybe I need to focus on me for a change
Thanks for the comment
And I am not going to tell you what is happening on Friday
July 21st, 2009 at 12:22 am
Um Omar …
Thank you for passing by
Sometimes I do express the resentment and show them that but they just don’t care or try to show they are sorry … so what is the point??
Anyway; I will try to not see them in the first place
July 26th, 2009 at 5:33 pm
I know what you mean Khalidah,it’s a slow process,dealing with the pain we go through in life.If it is really devastating,it will take a while,even to talk about it because we hurt so bad.
September 5th, 2009 at 11:33 pm
Khalidah, I just bumped into your blog and loved reading many posts. Very interesting perspectives on things!
About expectations, I believe all disappointments are caused by unrealistic expectations. You might like to read what I wrote about it: http://mushpanjwani.com/2009/06/24/what-do-you-expect/
Best wishes. Mush
December 14th, 2009 at 12:46 pm
Khalidah,
love readng your posts.
Keep writing